And just who will train those parents-to-be??? Spank, don't spank, timeouts,let them express themselves.... No wonder no one knows anymore. You know it's not that hard. Lay the boundaries and then enforce them. Kids should never have a doubt in their mind what the consequences will be if they break the rules. Just make it easier to do it right the first time. My girls survived it. They are both college grads with families of their own. We love, we laugh, we work and we truly enjoy each others' company. What more could we ask?

hi, your article is one that should cause a lot of us to thing real hard about what we are doing now and what is it that we should be doing.as for me i have three children and i found that each was trained different than the other because they all have their own personality. with your permission i would like to share your article with my jamaican listners on a one hour show that i host .the station is call bes fm 100 ;and i goes on the air @ 1pm to 2pm on saturdays.

My wife sent me this link and I think Amy is right on in this article. I know my wife and I question are we doing the right thing in regards to parenting. When grades are not up to our son's potential, what is the best way to get him back on track. I often ask myself, who is really in charge in my house. I tell myself it is my wife and I, but I lie a lot...

I am going to visit positive parenting solutions and find out what it is going to take to regain control of my home!

My husband and I started using some of the techniques Postive PArenting teaches and were amazed with the results. Ultimately parents want what is best for their kids and what we've learned is in fact best for our kids, but best for parents too.

Postive Parenting has something for all ages, not just toddlers. We recommend this to anyone looking to build a peaceful home and confient children. Thanks for the article Amy it is a great reminder of the amazing teaching you provide families.

My husband and I started using some of the tools Postive Parenting teaches and were amazed with the results. These simple tools have made a significant difference in creating a home filled with peace and harmony. Our kids have more confidence and so do we as parents.

We will always follow your articles and tips, because they are so valuable.

Somewhere along the way with new concepts like: Choices, mutual respect, and expectations we have lost the common sense in parenting. We have also gotten out of touch with our responsibility to raise children who understand that they are children. It is impossible to become successful well adjusted adults until we learn to become successful well adjusted children.

Children do not know or understand proper nutrition until we teach them by example how to prepare and enjoy a well balanced menu. When they are given the choices of cold cereal, a pop tart, or yogurt for breakfast...what do you expect? Set the alarm clock earlier...prepare a well balanced breakfast with all of the food groups and give it to them to eat. We are not short order cooks in a restaurant with a full compliment of refrigerated items and fully stocked cabinets to give them the menu and ask for their orders. Today's families are on budgets and meal planning is vital to staying within those budgets and getting the proper nutrition for their families. Not to mention the time restraints, and cleaning up after the meals.

The subject of cleanliness and living in a peaceful and well organized environment. Does anyone under the age of 55 make their beds every morning anymore? What about keeping the laundry done up so that it does not re-carpet the floors of the bedrooms and bathrooms? Dusting, cleaning the surfaces, windows, mirrors, sweeping and moping the floors and bathrooms and kitchens. No one wants to do these chores, but who in their right minds want to live in and raise their children in these pits that they call home. Not to mention again, cleaning the refrig. or oven. How can we expect our children to learn to take the responsiblity of maintaining a home if we do not show them by example?

Gift giving has been degraded to lists or orders prepared well in advance of special occasions and holidays! Has anyone heard of a surprise? What if I want to choose what I want to give my grandchildren without the fear of it being returned or regifted? I refuse to reduce the pleasure of gift giving to writing a check or buying a gift card or having my children tell me what I can give to my grandchildren. I recall my aunt hand knitting me a scaft and pair of angora gloves for Christmas one year when I was a pre-teen. At the time...I did not appreciate the gift, but I have saved those items and now at 60 years old they are among my most cherished posessions. Teach your children to honor the choices of the gift givers not only the items but the thought and work that goes into the process of giving what others can give and what they want to give.

Respect....what is that? The mouths fly open with all sorts of rude and disrespectful comments. Parents to children, children to parents, siblings to siblings, friends to friends. I have even listened to children speak to their teachers with contempt and disdain. In our days "Heads would roll" and am I grateful for the fear that my parents instilled in us to obey!

Screaming fits!!! OMG I raised three sons and never once had any of them throw a fit at home let alone in public.

Just try to negotiate what a 4 year old wants to wear to pre-school in the middle of the winter while you are busy, dressing a toddler, warming the car, finishing lunch, and doing the dishes. Not to mention putting winter coats, hats, boot, and gloves on their little hands. Just put the appropriate clothing on them and let them know who is in control with these matters. Give them choices when they launder, buy, and maintain their own clothing. For God's sakes what is the matter you people and your strange ideas about raising children

Most importantly, teach your children to honor their parents, grandparents, teachers, and God. Teach them God's laws and assist them in seeking his will for their lives. How can that be so hard? Take them to church. Stay home a little more and quit running to and fro in those filthy cluttered up poorly maintained vehicles. Not to mention talking on cell phone and texting while you jepordize your lives, the children's lives and innocent victims and their families. Take less vacations, stay out of the cancer producing tanning machines, and fat producing fast food restaurants. Our parents did it with multiple children and one middle class income! Enough is enough.

What has happened to good ol common sense when it comes to raising our children?

Temper tantrums at home or in public after age 2 seems ridiculous to me. Somehow these children have not had proper demonstrations made by their parents and adults in their lives about what is tolerable and what is not tolerable behavior.

How can any family given today's economy give their individual childen control of meal choices and clothing choices? We are not short order cooks...with a full compliment of grocery items in our refrig. and pantries...simply prepare well balanced sensible meals and serve them. When children are old enough to purchase, launder, and maintain their clothing...then they can choose what they want to wear. I refuse to negotiate with a four year old what they will wear to pre-school. Children under 12 years old really do not understand nutrition and family budgets do they?

Cleanliness and order are neglected by many parents today...What? make your beds everyday? Keep the laundry clean, folded, put away, and off the floors???? Be able to find your other shoe or heaven forbid your matching socks or gloves? Clean all hard surfaces weekly, change the sheets, clean ceiling fans, windows, blinds, sweep and mop floors! Teach children before they get to do hobbies, play, or visit with friends that these tasks are a part of living and maintaining order in their lives. Parents have to demonstrate these priorities in order for the children to get it! Is everyone in a fantasy world awaiting the maid to suddenly appear?

What ever happened to graciously accepting gifts that are given out of love and within the givers abilities to give? Lists, orders, expectations, expressions of disappointment, and rude behavior begin with the parents tolerating it. Appreciating another person's efforts, generosity, and caring seems to be overlooked by our children today. It is just expected!

Our children should consider it their jobs to go to school and do their best! It is a privilege to have loving parents and good teachers and a school system to enrich their lives and develop their abilities to survive this life after they leave the nests. It is not a right...it is a privilege. I all boils down to attitudes and example. Do you talk about how fortunate you are to even have good jobs and schools and homes?

Most importantly, teach your children to demonstrate love in your homes, at school, and to learn to live by God's laws and teachings. Create an atmosphere of peace, joy, and love in your homes and your children will calm down and enjoy the process of growing up. Of course there is stuggle, disappointments, saddness, failure. We must teach them to be thankful and to work to change injustice and social problems. We must teach them to serve others and to support their friends and loved ones in troubled times. Good ol fashioned giving and common sense. Rid yourselfs of so much greed...slow down...do some gardening, cooking, cleaning, go to church, take a gift to your neighbor or friend, wash the car, clean out the garage. Make your children a part of the tasks that are a vital part of survival.

This article makes me feel so much better. It is a relief to read that other parents out there are struggling with the same things. We know what we don't want to do (spank and yell), but it is not always obvious what to do right in the "heat of the battle". It would be so helpful if they would spend more time on NBC airing parenting classes such as Amy's. Our household appliances come with instruction manuals, but the kids sure do not. Plan to log on to her web-site, but hoping NBC will give more in-depth coverage of such an incredibly important topic!

Will this parenting topic be aired again?

Thank you, Amy! I want to learn more!

This is one of the best parenting articles I've ever read. I'm a preschool teacher and I sent this to all the parents in my class. It's a must-read!

I am so happy the TODAY show and TODAY Moms found Amy McCready! This article and the TODAY Show segment helps put my kids behavior into context and provides strategies to respond with that empower everybody, kids and parents. My goal is to be able to enjoy my children as they mature into adults and appreciate more tools to work with! I watch the TODAY show almost everyday and while I appreciate the many tips offered (hair, dress, money, marriage, cooking, diet) feel that parenting is the most important thing I do, and would enjoy a series on positive parenting!

I was really impressed with Amy's message on the Today show yesterday. Good parenting is not always intuitive, that is for sure. Thanks for providing some inspiration to this working mom who is trying to "do it all" and sure needs some simple but proven advice!

I read that learning skills for parenting is just as important and complex as learning skills for surgery. And I have to agree. We wouldn't perform actual surgery on our child because love and the best of intentions aren't enough to know how to avoid leaving critical wounds and scars. My children's emotions are just as important, and I don't want to leave scars and damage on their emotional and mental state, either.

My husband and I both grew up in homes with parents who we love, but were a disaster when it came to parenting and having a healthy marriage. After our dysfunctional family childhoods, we decided to really study how to be parents and stay in a loving marriage.

The research, discussions, and hard work pay off big time. I love Amy's advice and hope there are more segments on practical, positive parenting.

I continually am impressed with what Amy McCready shares with her growing audience. She tackles all the difficult subjects, gives very helpful--easy to implement tips, and gives the feeling that she really cares about how we all parent our children. I have become one of her big fans, and followers.

Amy is right on the money!! If people stop and really understand what she is saying it is all the things we want for our kids - to be respectful, kind, productive members of society and she is trying to teach parents that in order for that to happen they need to model the behaviour and she tells us how to do it. It is not about rolling over and giving in to a childs every whim, it's the opposite and she has been a life saver for me as a parent and I tell anyone who will listen to check out Positive Parenting!! She is a genius!!

What a great article. I agree that parenting is not instinctual and sometimes it takes way more than simple "common sense". Parenting is learned - we learn it from our own parents, grandparents, and even our friends. But so often the techniques we learned don't work for us or our children and we need help. I watched Amy on the Today show last week and hope to see more of her. This article is fantastic and I've already incorporated much of Amy's techniques into our family. I really hope to hear more from Positive Parenting/Amy. Thank you so much for the advice!