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By Dr. Roshini Raj, TODAY medical contributor and author of "What the Yuck?!"
Supermodels trying to dictate public health policy? Not a great idea.
But that's exactly what seemed to happen earlier this week when Gisele Bundchen, the model married to Tom Brady, told Harper's Bazaar UK that it should be "worldwide law" that all moms should breast-feed their kids for six months.
"Some people here think they don't have to breast-feed, and I think 'Are you going to give chemical food to your child when they are so little?'"
Let me start by saying I am a huge fan of breast-feeding. With both of my sons, I breast-fed or gave them pumped milk for an entire year, because I felt that it was the most nutritious food for them.
The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends exclusive breast-feeding for the first six months of an infant’s life and then continued breast-feeding until 12 months of age.
Health benefits for a breast-fed baby include decreased infections, possibly enhanced cognitive development and a possible decrease in the development of allergies, diabetes and other chronic diseases. Mothers who breast-feed also report decreased rates of post-partum depression, more rapid weight loss post-pregnancy and decreased cancer rates long-term.
So is Gisele right? Should we make it mandatory that all new mothers breast-feed for at least six months?
Well as a working mother, let me tell you that breast-feeding and later pumping breast milk was one of the hardest experiences of my life.
Medical school and residency were easy in comparison!
The relentless schedule of pumping, the inability to never get more than five or six hours of sleep in a row, the fact that no matter where I was or what I was doing, the world essentially had to stop so I could pump or feed the baby made me more that a little insane at times.
But even more than the mental toll – which I still think was worth it – the impact on a career is huge. I was very lucky to have the autonomy and flexibility in my job so that I could set aside time to pump while at work.
But most women do not have this luxury, don’t have a private space to pump at work and have to return to work so soon after having a baby, that breast-feeding is impossible. And I’m not even talking about the long-term impact this schedule can have on your career.
I suspect Gisele does not have to worry about these issues nearly as much as the rest of us. I strongly believe that new mothers should be educated about the benefits of breast-feeding and encouraged to breast-feed, but they also need the tools to make it happen – namely more understanding work policies that allow women longer maternity leaves and spaces and time at work to pump.
Gisele later modified her comments by saying “as mothers, we are trying our best” – that sounds more like it. Being a new mom is hard enough without being judged.
TODAY medical contributor Dr. Roshini Raj, a mother of two, is board certified in gastroenterology and internal medicine with a medical degree from New York University School of Medicine and an undergraduate degree from Harvard College. Dr. Raj is also the medical editor of Health Magazine. Her first book, "What the Yuck?! The Freaky & Fabulous Truth About Your Body," debuted in 2010 and it answers the real questions you’re dying to ask a doctor.
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I think that no matter how popular or well-known someone is, they should do what is right for them and let other adults do the same. Believe it or not, just because we can't make a living smiling for a camera and walking up and down a runway or marry a pro football player, we are not stupid. I, fortunately, was able to stay home with my 3 children for over 10 years. Each one was breast fed for 1 year and never took a bottle. How about if I request that it be a law that every new mom should take off work for 1 year after having a child so they could breast feed and bond? Frankly,I think that sounds just as ridiculous.
Not everyone is fortunate enough to be able to do that physically or financially. I think celebrities should stop trying to make decisions for everyone else. Not everyone has the same income and privileges as celebrities. I equate that to Matt Lauer suggesting that the government make it mandatory to have infant sensors in the care to make sure a baby not be left in the car. Then he went on to make a semi-big deal about the "brilliant" idea to put the diaper bag or brief case in the back seat so you have to go there to check the seat. Got news for you. I started doing that 15 years ago due to common sense, not some revelation publicized by a celebrity. I normally enjoy Matt's segments, but found that insulting Does he really think mothers are too stupid to think of thing like that? Maybe I would not have to clip coupons and shop on clearance racks if I tried to tell everybody how they are supposed to be doing things, no matter how simplistic.
Seriously??? THIS is news worthy???? Hello people - Gisele has an opinion - she's entitled to it. Doesn't mean anyone has to listen to it. It's an opinion period. Why on earth does anyone even respond. Breastfeeding is a personal choice. Yours is quite frankly - NONE OF MY BUSINESS. This whole thing is stupid and the media is being plan and simply ridiculous for even giving airtime to this. Bringing on speakers to address the subject??? OMG are we all really THAT shallow???
Unfortunately, there is a larger fall out that we have seen occur (such as with body image & the media) when individuals in the public eye (particuarly supermodels) make comments that continue to set unrealistic belifefs about motherhood. Regardless of whether it's intentional or not- comments such as these can lead to feelings of guilt or shame for mothers who are not able OR who choose not to meet these "standards" that are "mandated" by others. See: From Postpartum Depression to the Empty Nest Syndrome: The Motherhood Mystique Revisited, by Dr. Johnston-Robledo; an article found in Lectures on the Psychology of Women; Chrisler, Golden, and Rozee (2nd ed).
Why is it celebs think they are authorities on everything? Gisele Bundchen is a model & a mother. I didn't realize she was a Dr. & politician because she also thinks her opinion should be law. Let her concern herself with her child noone else's. Some women prefer not to breastfeed ....that is their right.
This article and the American Academy of Pediatrics claim she was right. Maybe she actually did her homework and had an educated opinion.
Stop crying ladies, anyone has the right to their opinion and she provided hers.
I mean it isn't like you are bad mother if you put your own personal considerations ahead of giving your child the healthiest options possible, right? ;)
You are a man, right? I assume so because after reading the entire article and the comments, what you got from it was not even the *point*.
The point is NOT if she is right about breastfeeding for a year, but that who is she to say it should be a law to do so. Not everyone can do it, physically or financially. I did, but I had my own office, my child in daycare across the street from my job, and the freedom to block off time whenever I wanted to sit at my desk and pump away. In my current job, I sit in a open floor plan and there is no mother's room in which to pump and my daycare is 5 miles away.
I would never judge someone who does not have to option to stay in the house for a year after giving birth with a boob in their kid's mouth. I am the breadwinner in my house and in order to keep us afloat I had to go back to work after 10 weeks.
It is recommended, but not something that your government should enforce you *idiot*.
Okay......, Shawn?!?
She has one kid and now think she is an expert on this? Alot of people have to work outside the home and don't have the luxury or time to do this.......she needs to keep her naive mouth shut.
Shawn my comment didn't say anything about the government enforcing it or not. It simply reiterated that she was right about the fact that breast feeding is better for your children.
Maybe you should relax a little and stop calling people names out here. Bad anger management skills are another signs of a bad mother...
my mother breastfed me for two months, then she become pregnant with my brother and her milk dried up. that whole "you can't get pregnany when breastfeeding" thing is a myth. I'm 27, perfectly fine with no health issues. sometimes BF is out of your control, no matter how much you want to do it. I plan on BFing my son when he's born (5 weeks to go!) but if I can't, i'm not going to feel guilty about it. we all do the best we can.
This is off the main subject. Today on KLG and Hoda, a divorced mom said moms should not worry about losing their kids in divorce. My daughter's son was taken from her because of connections in a small town. it can happen. My daughter is an excellent mom with no abuse of any kind and never neglected her children. Th GAL helped the father and a circle of unethical people worked together against my daughter because his family is WELL CONNECTED. The GAL lied on the stand in court. It has been a television movie type of corruption. If only someone would hear this story and help.
Vicki
NO, IndependentThinker, you are NOT a bad mother if you choose not to breastfeed. Many women do, for many different reasons. And what of adoptive mothers, who simply have no breast milk to give? Are they bad? Breast is best. Got it. Lots of us make different choices and our kids turn out just fine. I've never liked Gisele Bundchen, and her stupid comment makes me like her even less.
Guess I'd have been arrested under "Gisele's law", since I had breast reduction surgery, back before they figured out that you don't have to remove the lactating glands. I had to get the reduction because of back and neck problems, not vanity. I think my two very healthy (now adult) children benefitted from having a mother who wasn't so incapacitated by pain and surgeries, that she couldn't take proper care of them. As others said, I totally agree that breastfeeding is the best way to go, but *forcing* it on us? Um, no.
NO, IndependentThinker, you are NOT a bad mother if you choose not to breastfeed. Many women do, for many different reasons. And what of adoptive mothers, who simply have no breast milk to give? Are they bad? Breast is best. Got it. Lots of us make different choices and our kids turn out just fine. I've never liked Gisele Bundchen, and her stupid and ill-informed comments just make me like her even less.
Agreed!!! I don't like Gisele either. She also said in an article that she felt like Tom Brady's first son with another woman was hers. I wonder how she would feel if Tom left her for another woman and that woman said she felt like Gisele's son was hers. This shows what sort of mentality she has. Can you imagine a law that every woman had to breastfeed? What would our punishment be if we didn't? Would we have to go to court to prove we had a valid reason for not breastfeeding? It's so hard to believe that a woman of today would say that. And for all the men out there who judge women for not breastfeeding or getting upset over statements like this why don't you try breastfeeding? I mean, men have the right equipment just not the right hormones. I'm sure science could figure out a way for dads to help nourish their own offspring. C'mon guys, DON'T BE SO SELFISH!!!!
My mom told me a story when I was expecting my first child about a woman she was friends with years before. The friend was a few years younger than my mom, and was expecting her first baby. She was reading every book she could get a hold of in order to be the best mommy possible. One conversation she and my mother had was about breast feeding. The friend asked my mom if she had breast fed me, and my mom answered, "No, not one drop. Breast feeding just wasn't for me." The friend replied in a very condescending tone, "Oh, well, non-breast fed babies grow up to be not as intelligent as breast fed babies." My mom simply replied, "Well, it's a good thing I didn't breast feed her, because she's already a staight A student. I'd hate if she were skipping grades, too."
Breast feeding is a personal choice. My grandmother didn't breast feed my mom or her siblings in the 1940's/50's. My mom did have scoliosis, but I don't think that was due to not being breast fed.
Anyway, I didn't breast feed either my children, because I just wasn't comfortable with it either. Sorry, I just wasn't. But, I am happy to say that I hardly know my kids' pediatrician, because I can count just using my fingers how many time BOTH of my kids have been to the doctor for ill visits. My oldest is 12 and my youngest is 5. They both have amazing immune systems. Oh, and they excel at school, too, without a drop of breast milk. Go figure.
I breastfed each of my four children for a full year because it was best for THEM, not best for ME. I get angry when people like Gisele and even the author of this article make statements that breastfeeding results in more rapid weight loss after pregnancy. I am so tired of being judged by others! I know dozens of lucky moms who get back to their pre-pregnancy weight because breastfeeding helps, but I also know dozens of women like me who are unable to lose weight and may even gain because they are nursing babies. I eventually lose the weight about 2 years after each baby--only to gain it all again. None of us needs a supermodel stating that breastfeeding is how she got her body back. Obviously, she had supermodel genes to begin with.
I breastfed my twins for eight months, until they chose to quit. I still haven't lost one ounce of my "baby fat" from the pregnancy and the babies are now in their twenties.
Pushing your plate away when you have had enough is how you lose the weight. You both already knew that but as your complaint about people judging you shows you would rather blame things outside your control.
Great article! I am a working mom, and was lucky to have my own office where I could easily pump, but even then it was hard! Meetings pop up, schedules get rearranged, but I still managed to nurse both my children for 18 months and never had to use formula. However, I have friends who never considered using formula, but when the reality of pumping at their jobs set in (nurses, teachers, retail managers, all jobs that making pumping VERY hard!), they really struggled. The author is right that what moms need are longer maternity leaves and a confortable place to pump that is not a restroom. My point, and the point of this article, is do the best you can do for your babies, but please don't judge other moms! All moms need support, and all children need to learn from their moms that judging others is not ok.
Not all mothers who WANT to breastfeed can. My son was born with a cleft lip and was UNABLE to breastfeed (no matter how hard I tried). I feel lucky to have formula and live in this day and age. Had my son been born 200 years ago, he would have died or been left to die because of his lip. People need to be greatful that we HAVE options!
My oldest had a cleft palate. I pumped milk, and we very carefully poured it into her. We'd have had to do the same if we'd used formula. It's not so much the _how_, but the _what_.
Just as a side note, not all women can pump. I during my BF years ran into many a woman even with the 300.00 fancy pumps could not get an ounce pumping but could BF just fine and their children thrived. Pumps arent the solution to every latch issue either.
Genenut - the best pump on earth is the BABY!
I know that, I was just mentioning for those who think a breast pump solves the how do I BF and work question/problem.
I pumped for 6 months with all 3 of my children. The second one ended up in the emergency room with croup at 4 months, long before he saw a drop of formula, and had 2 ear infections on breast milk as well. My third has a milk intolerance, but I gave her breastmilk anyway to help her immune system. She has been on soy formula for 2 weeks now. And she is finally gaining weight and not spitting up as much. I just wonder how much better off she'd be if I had given her formula earlier.
A LAW? Really? It should be mandated by the United States Government and the governments around the world that a woman MUST breastfeed. Or what Giselle? Hmm? Jail? A hefty fine when new parents are already financially drained. Not that you would know anything about that. Right?
You lost your baby weight breastfeeding? Good for you. I lost my baby weight...all of it...the month I stopped breastfeeding.
Maybe it should be a law that uninformed, judgeMENTAL supermodels keep their mouths shut.
Right, because the only reason to breastfeed or not would be financial or based on losing the baby weight… not because it’s just plain better for the brand new person that needs every possible advantage given to them.
So you really think there should be a law mandating mothers breastfeed? Of course it's best for the baby. I did it myself for as long as I could. But no one has the right to force me or any mom, by rule of law, to breastfeed. End of story. For many moms, it is not successful no matter how hard they try.
So you and Giselle need to get off your high-horse.
A law really? That is harsh! I tried my absolute hardest to breast feed my son! I pumped and pumped and put him on the nipple every chance I could, only to squeeze out maybe an ounce! It was devastating for me. I even tried the prescription drug that helps to increase milk flow, but it didn't work. I would have LOVED to give my son breastmilk through the first year, but after 2 months I just could not provide enough for him. Some women just can't do it physically!
Tricia, that was me, too. I had every intention of breastfeeding, but nature had other ideas. So formula it was! I'm happy to say that my daughter is healthy and happy, and according to her teachers, the smartest kid in her class.
I do believe breast is best - it's just natural. But it's not the only way, and it's not awful or bad to choose formula, for any reason whatsoever. There are worse things.
I kind of agree with Giselle’s first comment. I’m sure people will be upset because she’s not a doctor or politician and her opinion should have any more weight than anyone else’s, but her opinion should be held by everybody anyway.
Employers should HAVE to offer a place (and un-timed breaks) to nursing mothers to pump milk. The public should be so desensitized to mothers nursing that it’s no big deal even if it’s caught on camera and broadcast on TV. It should be such an accepted part of our social structure that to see a can of formula belonging to a mother who cannot nurse for medical reasons (such as being on medication or mastectomy) that it causes a double take or curiosity. Hospitals should be prohibited from handing out samples of formula unless prescribed by a doctor and formula manufacturers should be prohibited from all advertisements.
There are too many benefits to the living tissue that is breast milk to pretend that formula even comes close. All humans should have free access to it until we switch to solid food.
That new health care reform law everyone loves to hate requires employers with more than 50 employess to give women a private space and unpaid time off to pump breastmilk unless they can demonstrate it would be detrimental to work flow to do so.
Obama got that part right.
I believe that as a parent you should want to do what is best for your child. Breastfeeding is best. Hands down. If you are physically able to breast feed then in my eyes there is no excuse as to why you would not want to other then that you are lazy. Too lazy to pump or make yourself avaiable every 2 hours. Welcome to parenthood... Its time to put your child first!
And what about the parent who MUST work and cannot take off every 2-3 hours to pump (retail workers come to mind as one catagory that falls in this situation)? What if your child CANT breastfeed or cant process your milk. Sometimes mother nature doesnt get it right and its not due to the mom. That's not lazy. Giving your child formula in these situations IS putting your child first.
Judge not lest ye be judged....
I was a Mom who had to return to work 5 weeks after my baby was born. I have two grown children and neither of them was breastfed, because I HAD to work to maintain my health insurance. My youngest daughter is an athlete who is 5/11, no allergies, healthy, strong. My oldest now has two children of her own, she is extremely healthy with no allergies as well. I have always been made to feel guilty that I didn't breastfeed. Like a deprived them...but I assure you, they were never deprived, healthier than most (including many breastfed babies) and are now strong healthy adults. What mother wouldn't love to sit home with her baby and be on call 24/7 to breast feed and nuture them....but Gisele for the rest of us in the REAL WORLD it's not that easy...we have bills to pay, a roof to keep over ourheads and insurance in case our baby got sick!
I agree that breastfeeding is best. I had every intention of breastfeeding my son, even rented a hospital grade pump so I could pump milk to store for him when I had to go back to work after 6 weeks. Well, my milk just didn't come in. We didn't want to give him a bottle to avoid confusion, so for the first 10 days of his life, we fed him formula out of a special cup. I continued to try to breastfeed him for 20 minutes every 2-3 hours, then fed him the formula from the cup, laid him down and then pumped for 20-30 minutes. The most I ever got after a full day of pumping was 1 ounce. Definitely not enough to feed a growing baby. I eventually abandoned my efforts as I was a zombie and not bonding well with my son because I was too caught up in trying to get him as much breast milk as I could. My husband was very supportive through the whole thing, but was relieved when I finally decided to quit. My son was much better off having me a little better rested, and able to play with him. If you can breastfeed, I think you should, but women who can't shouldn't be made to feel guilty about it.
The above paragraph SHOULD read:
Health considerations for a formula-fed baby include increased infections, possibly reduced cognitive development and a possible increase in the development of allergies, diabetes and other chronic diseases. Mothers who formula-feed also report increased rates of post-partum depression, slower weight loss post-pregnancy and increased cancer rates long-term.
Breastfeeding should be considered the NORM, not formula feeding. So don't compare breastfeeding to formula feeding, but compare formula feeding to breastfeeding.
I totally agree it is a choice (and shouldn't be a law) but new moms need to start thinking of breastfeeding as what should happen and compare formula feeding (and the possible ramifications from it) to it when making that choice.
...and I know it is hard. I nursed both of my kids well past one year, and pumped for both after returning back to work until each child's first birthday.
I agree that breastfeeding is best. I had every intention of breastfeeding my son, even rented a hospital grade pump so I could pump milk to store for him when I had to go back to work after 6 weeks. Well, my milk just didn't come in. We didn't want to give him a bottle to avoid confusion, so for the first 10 days of his life, we fed him formula out of a special cup. I continued to try to breastfeed him for 20 minutes every 2-3 hours, then fed him the formula from the cup, laid him down and then pumped for 20-30 minutes. The most I ever got after a full day of pumping was 1 ounce. Definitely not enough to feed a growing baby. I eventually abandoned my efforts as I was a zombie and not bonding well with my son because I was too caught up in trying to get him as much breast milk as I could. My husband was very supportive through the whole thing, but was relieved when I finally decided to quit. My son was much better off having me a little better rested, and able to play with him. If you can breastfeed, I think you should, but women who can't shouldn't be made to feel guilty about it.
I was bent on breast feeding my daughter for 2 years. But to my disappointment, I didn't have one drop of milk- so formula it was. Devastated at first (primarily b/c of societal pressures of b.feeding) but then realized there are MANY more ways to bond with your child. Breast milk is definitely the best source of nutrition, but making it mandatory (thus making the women who cannot stand out even more) is a ridiculous idea. My daughter is now 27 months old, and I must say, she is smarter than any other breast fed 2 year old around her (and there are many). She is ahead of her game, and I'm not saying that as a mother, her pediatrician said it and says it every time he sees her.
Its not what you feed them, its the love and nurturing that is key to a happy, healthy child.
When I became pregnant, I had every intention of breastfeeding. It's free, it's best for the baby, it helps you lose weight. I wanted to be the "perfect" mom. I imagined myself as this whole earth mother goddess person who did everything right. It wasn't that easy and that was never my reality. My pregnancy was really hard on my body. I was in so much pain that I had to quit my job 2 months into my pregnancy. Morning sickness that usually stops after the first trimester lasted the entire pregnancy. I couldn't stomach food and was only able to eat jello by the last couple of months. I never dilated on my own nor did I go into labor and had to be induced, first with a suppository to dilate my cervix, which took two courses and three days to work, and then with a pitocin drip to actually induce labor, which took over 12 hours to actually complete. I passed out from lack of oxygen after I was given the epidural, which was recommended because of the pitocin or I wouldn't have had one. I had to wear an oxygen mask during the whole thing. Then I finally get to see my beautiful daughter, hold her, and try to nurse her. Only nothing happened. I had read that it was ok if she didn't eat for like a week, which I was skeptical about, but I knew that while in the hospital, the pediatrician wouldn't let her starve. I tried again. She was screaming when nothing happened, so I asked my OBGYN about it and he sent in the LC. She made sure my child was latching right because I have large breasts and sometimes it doesn't come easily. She was doing everything right, I was doing everything right, and still nothing was happening.
Then I realized that my breasts never became engorged. They weren't swollen at all, no bigger than usual. I wasn't ever leaking or anything. I had an allergic reaction to the adhesive on the bandage used to keep the epidural in place and another reaction to the latex gloves that touched me from my stomach down to the knees. I needed a cortisone shot to get rid of the hives that were so bad that I couldn't wear clothing. I just laid in bed with my baby, naked, trying to feed her. I put up with that for almost a week because I didn't want to put anything in my body that may wind up in my non-existent milk. When the screaming of my starving child became too much to bear, I filled a bottle that someone else had given me with the formula that the hospital gave me and fed my baby. She stopped crying and I filled up with guilt. I was incapable of feeding my child from my body. My breasts really were just decorative items for men to stare at. Had there been no such thing as bottles and formula, my perfectly healthy daughter would have starved and it would have been my fault because my body was defective. I felt that guilt for years, especially when bombarded with billboards and commercials from the breastfeeding nazis out there who not only say you're doing it wrong if you didn't breastfeed and claim it's abusive, but who also claim that if you "couldn't" breastfeed, that you just didn't try hard enough. I didn't give up because I had to go to work, because I just didn't like it, or because it was too hard. I gave up because my daughter was starving and my breasts never had any milk in them. Ever. I've been treated like a liar by women who don't even know me or what I went through. I was on a comment thread about this very subject yesterday where someone actually said how interesting that when there are only about 5% of women in the world who are physically incapable of producing breastmilk and they all seem to have responded on this thread. Yes, 5% is a small number, but if just the 5% of women in the US who couldn't produce milk responded on that thread, over 7 million responses would have been there.
Do I resent Gisele's comments about breastfeeding? You're damn right I do. It just encourages all those dogmatic breastfeeders out there who don't know how to keep their noses out of other people's business. It still hurts, nearly 12 years later, that I sucked so bad at being the mother I wanted to be. I am an awesome mom, my child tells me that every day. She's smart, beautiful, self-confident, thin, healthy. But every day I wonder if her allergies and ear infections are my fault.
Dont blame yourself for the allergies or the ear infections. I formula fed my first due to complications from a VERY traumatic C section and such. He has no allergies we know of to this day (he is 15) and only 2 ear infections his entire life, one of which was brought on by a transpacific flight. My youngest I breast fed for 18 months (exclusively pumping the last 12 due to latch issues), he has alot of allergies including one to milk and had recurring ear infections requiring tubes to be placed twice. I know breast was best for him but it certainly didn't stop the allergies from forming, his ear infections from forming or the surgery to places tubes, just mitigated the effect of the allergies for a while.
As long as you are the one to make the choice and the baby is healthy and being fed is all that matters. I've been on both sides of the choice and each side has guilt and difficulties.
Judgemental idiots like Gazelle are the problem (yes the spelling was intentional). She comes from a country that condones parental kidnapping even when the parent is legally insane and in violation of international law. Her opinion is worth less than a dirty diaper.
I breastfed my children. The first for six weeks because he wasn't gaining (turns out he was allergic to casein) before I put him on soy-based formula. He is healthy and doing fine sixteen years later. IQ over 140, gifted program at school, well-adjusted, athletic but has allergies and gets migraines.
Children 2 and 3 I restricted my diet to completely avoid casein (it's in the strangest things) and nursed them for a year each. These children are ALSO gifted (only second has been IQ tested but it was also over 140) athletic, charming, but have severe allergies.
I look at this and realize, hm, we have a FAMILY HISTORY of allergies and migraine. the outcomes for my children didn't relate to breastfeeding, they related to their genetic inheritances.
Correlation does not imply causation...
I have tears from reading your comment. I went through total hell when my daughter was born because no matter what we tried, she would not breast feed. I had multiple nurses, LC's, etc. work with me and no matter what we tried, she still would not breast feed. We tried so hard, every feeding, to the point that she started to scream when she even got near my breast. I was a total wreck with guilt and anxiety. In the end, I broke down and formula fed her, bawling the whole time because I felt that I had failed her as a mother. It took my whole family working on me to help ease that guilt and get me to realize that I could be a good mom without breastfeeding and find other ways to bond with her and support her. She's 2 now, highly intelligent and advanced (acoording to her pediatrician), funny, sweet and just a wonderful little girl. Yes, she's had a couple of ear infections, and yes, she has an allergy to amoxicillin and has issues with milk, but she is otherwise very healthy and remarkable. We have a strong bond and I owe it to my family and my wonderful husband who begged me to give it up and just be her mom.
Then I see things like this and that dreaded guilt and fear that failed her creep back in. I don't doubt for a second that you did all you could for your little one, and still do. Kids get allergies, ear infections, etc. whether breast fed or formula fed. Each kid is unique. We can't always control what life throws at us, but we can do our best with what we have. Stay strong and proud that your daughter loves you, and that you did all you could for her. That is what makes a good mother. Don't let superficial, judgment idiots like this ever take that knowledge from you!
I teared up when I read this too! It brought back everything I went through with my kids. I tried so hard to nurse them but had results just like yours. No engorgement, no letdown, no milk. I tried pumping till I bled. For the first few days of my son's life the nurses said I was just doing it wrong and would not "allow" me to try to feed him another way. As a brand new mom, I didn't know any better--until he was hospitalized with dehydration. I was sobbing with relief for finally being "allowed" to feed my starving baby a bottle of formula. Nobody should have to go through that. I had a wonderful compassionate doctor who told me it wasn't my fault and not to listen to those people who were telling me it was. I was still ashamed and regretful that I couldn't do it though, especially when my second child had allergies to most kinds of formula and I wished I could nurse him instead. I kept trying for a couple of months each time, but the milk just never came in and I fell back on the formula. There are some people who physically can't make milk....and it must run in families because my mom and my grandma couldn't do it either. Of course we know it would have been better to breast feed and we'd have done it if we could. We all turned out fine anyway. It makes me sad to hear the pain and fear judgmental people put new moms through over breastfeeding, especially ones who don't even get to make the choice. That's why my only advice to people who are having babies is, "listen to YOURSELF first--you're the one who will know the best way to take care of YOUR baby."
She needs to stick to her day job, which isn't politician, or doctor, but supermodel. We have enough judgmental airheads in this world as it is, we don't need her imposing her lifestyle on us as well. Unlike her, many of us work (as in full-time, physical and mental labor, we are not sitting pretty for a photographer or walking on a runway to be admired), and most us certainly don't have a millionaire husband that can support us so we can spend time with our child. Put yourself in other mothers' shoes before you open your mouth and upset other mothers.
Amen! Who the f cares what some spoiled model obviously disconnected from the reality of everyday life thinks? My head almost exploded when I realized what this story is about! Too many people in the public eye think the world wants to hear what they have to say; we don't. Go back to posing, bimbo, and keep your stupid opinions to yourself.
What is all this guilt about not breastfeeding??? I was born in the early 1950's - American women didn't breast feed then - it was considered too primitive and, frankly, gross. Why do you *think* they invented formula and pureed baby food???? A whole generation or more grew up and prospered even though they had been "bottle-fed" from the get-go. If you want to breast feed, and can, go right ahead. But stop laying a guilt-trip on everyone else. and stop *feeling* guilty if you can't or don't want to.
If the worst thing you ever do to your kid is not breast-feed him/her, you'll be a candidate for the Mother of the Century Award.
It was reported Tuesday, August 3, on NPR's Boston affiliate WGBH on
the "Emily Rooney Show" (12:00PM) that according to a Gisele Bundchen intimate, Ms B actually breastfeed her bundle of joy for THREE (3) WEEKS. Clearly, based on this experience, Ms B is an authority. Least we be critical, it should be noted that breastfeeding can increase one's appetite, put a crimp in one's lovemaking (leaky bosoms) and keep one away from a $25,000,000/year career so Ms B should be forgiven for not practicing what she preaches.
Being from Brasil, Mrs. Brady doubtless grew up SEEING women nurse their infants and while her commentary might SOUND militant, it don't see it that way. She doesn't need defending from me or anyone else - but I suspect that she likely finds it bizarre that any mom does not breast feed and her newly discovered protective hormone is what is talking here. Finally, she's a model - and we ought to take her comments as those of a young women, beautiful with every privilege available and who obviously is a proponent of breast feeding.
I'll bet she lost ALL her pregnancy weight in less than two weeks and she is ONE LUCKY GAL. However, I was lucky too. I took five years off during MY career (medicine) which was desperate for my return so I DID have the great good fortune to got the distance without much pumping. Eight months for my son and 14 months for my daughter. The New York housewife, Bethenny Frankel, also held forth on breast feeding and pumping. All new mothers think that THEY discovered breast feeding. It's typical.