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Subscribe to RSSTo the average observer, I am a breast-feeding mother of a three month old infant. But the truth is more complex. I was once the embodiment of a La Leche League wet (pun intended) dream. Now, I am a part-time formula user. Yes -- I am one of the secret supplementers.
When my first son was born, I was a newly minted stay-at-home mom. I’d left my job in corporate litigation to go in-house. My son took to the breast. And took to it. And took to it. As a new and clueless parent, I generally made the assumption that if the kid was crying, he was hungry. If we go by hours, I’m pretty sure that more than half of my little baby’s life was spent with my breast in his mouth. I never pumped: after all, why should I? I was with this guy all the time. If he and I were dating, it would have been labeled a dysfunctional relationship. I took him into breast-feeding “support” groups and the other attendees marveled as my boy rocked the scale.
Coutesy: Jordana Horn
Baby G, 3-month-old daughter of Jordana Horn, had both breast milk and formula. And doesn't she look happy?
Fast-forward eight years. In the interim, I had another son, I divorced and remarried, and now, this summer, had a daughter. I am a journalist with daily deadlines. When pregnant and asked if I was going to breastfeed, I said, “Of course,” and received a pleased smile from my obstetrician.
So after giving birth, seeing my family, saying hi to my sister who had just gone into labor down the hall – no kidding – I felt kind of tired. It was a big day. And when the nurses asked me whether I wanted to get up that night to feed the baby, I said, you know something? Let’s wait till morning and give her a bottle of (gasp!) formula when she’s hungry.
See, this is where you’re supposed to react with shock and horror. Because we all know “breast is best.” Because we all know that any bottle might seduce your young kid’s mouth away from your breast. Because we all know that formula is terrible, terrible! I, of course, was raised entirely on formula back in the day and ended up being a healthy productive member of society with two degrees from an Ivy League institution, but let’s go back to talking about how formula is the nectar of the devil.
Actually, let’s not. I’m convinced that those initial bottles helped teach my baby that plastic nipples could be just as good as mine – a good thing for when I had to go back to work. And while I pumped like a maniac, when my supply dipped due to vagaries of my professional and personal schedule, I supplemented my breast-feeding with formula.
Why do people think this is anathema? Breast-feeding advocates will tell you that supplementing can damage your supply of breastmilk. But if I’m not at home all the time with my child – or if I am at home, but am busy with my other children – isn’t it best to give my child some formula as opposed to none? Why is breast-feeding versus formula feeding put to parents as an all-or-nothing choice? And why are we made to feel ashamed for giving anything less than 100percent to our children?
Lactation consultant Heather Kelly knows breast-feeding is best – but also feels that the choice of “either/or” posed to new mothers is a false dichotomy. It’s a misconception, she told me, that every mother can make enough breastmilk for their baby. Most women can, but some women can’t due to scant breast tissue, breast surgery, medical complications, etc.
“We also have a very, very polarized view of breast-feeding in our culture; that is to say, you are either fully or exclusively breastfeeding and offering no formula at all, or you are a complete failure, “ Kelly said.
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"The truth is, formula can co-exist with breastfeeding, as long as the mother's supply is properly maintained and managed,” she added.
“If you are a mother with no nursing problems, a good supply, and a desire to get a break from breast-feeding, it is not as healthy a choice to bring in formula as it is to pump your own breastmilk and give it to the baby in a bottle,” Kelly said. “This is simply a medical fact.”
But you know something? For this mom (and baby), it’s not the end of the world either.
Jordana Horn is a TODAY Moms contributor, lawyer, journalist, writer and mother of three. Sometimes, she even sleeps.
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Formula, while far inferior to breast milk, might be tolerable to supplement mother's milk, as long as it is not soy-based. Soy is associated with thyroid abnormalities and hormonal problems, as well as multiple vitamin and mineral imbalances. Soy formula contains many harmful substances not found in mother's milk, including phytates, phytoestrogens, protease inhibitors, allergenic proteins, and aluminum. Researchers estimate that infants fed exclusively soy formula received the estrogen equivalent of five birth control pills per day. For the health of our rising generation, soy formula simply should be pulled from the market! An even stronger case could be made regarding the very serious health hazards associated with Aspartame, but that's a story for another time...
Except for babies like mine who have severe reactions to milk-based formula. Not every baby can tolerate milk-based formula or the high iron content. Soy formula was a lifesaver for our children.
What feeding a baby is about, or rather, what feeding a baby should be about, is informed decision making. The fact is that there are health qualities to breastmilk that formula simply can't replicate. Feeding a newborn a bottle (or more) of either formula or expressed breastmilk CAN cause challenges to some babies, as there are some babies who do prefer drinking via bottle to drinking from breast - the reasons for this are complicated and can't always be predicted, which is why mothers who are breastfeeding are encouraged to try to avoid bottles ... IF that is possible, IF that is a decision they are comfortable with. While breastfeeding is being established, IF a mother isn't producing enough milk for her baby then of course formula is to be used (if the mom has no access to and/or isn't comfortable using donor milk) as of course a hungry baby needs to be fed! After breastfeeding is established, IF a mother wants to introduce a bottle of either pumped milk or formula, then the informed decision-making is to ensure she knows to pump to maintain her supply (as any time a bottle is used, it is a missed signal to the body to make milk, and will end up affecting her supply). Or, use formula and don't pump, but know that her milk supply will be affected ... not for any blame to be placed there, just so she knows and doesn't have her milk supply dry up sooner than she would like overall. But at the end of the day, it is the mom's choice what she wants to do and there is a difference between ensuring informed decision making vs. judgement. And for all the moms/practitioners/dads (though they are usually a lot less judgy!) out there who do judge moms who use formula, shame on you. I am sure all the adopted and orphaned children who are being raised on formula are QUITE happy it was invented!!
It's interesting how judgmental people are.. A few comments above said something like "It's ok if...as long as the formula is not soy based," and others say it's ok to do XYZ "as long as" whatever. What about families where the mother is sick or, (heaven forbid) dies? Or adopted kids? Or orphans? Isn't the responsibility of any parent or caregiver - to FEED the child under their care? Babies can't feed themselves so you have to feed them - and if you can not, or don't want, or are not having a good time with, the whole breast thing - because of WHATEVER reason (like you just adopted a baby from Haiti, or you don't produce milk, or you are a single dad, etc.) then isn't that kind of between you and your baby? Of course barring insane stuff like feeding them Coke or something - I am not talking about stupidity. I think moms and dads should be informed and intelligent about it, but we moms really should stop being so mean to each other. Here is my story: First baby, horrid breast feeder. I stressed and freaked out - I was a postpartum MESS over this very issue. I finally "gave in" and supplemented and the baby was SO much happier, but I felt guilty. Two years later - baby number two: took right to the breast and I never gave her a bottle or even pumped - we were little Mrs. and Miss Natural - it was divine. So I say - feed and love your baby and enjoy.
Yes, your baby is beautiful, and looks happy, healthy and well-fed. If over the coming months or years, she develops allergies, upper or lower respiratory infections, or diabetes (and I most certainly hope that she does not), who would possibly think there could be any relationship to that early introduction of formula at day one of age? But medical research shows that there may actually be a strong relationship - and no one ever talks about it. Where is the informed consent, indeed?
The baby’s digestive tract is the front line of their immune system and is sterile at birth. Introducing formula – yes, even one bottle – has implications. It's not about nipple confusion, or impacting your milk supply.
It's about the sensitive period of gut permeability and susceptibility to the sensitizing proteins found in formula that can lead to allergies, eczema, or even diabetes.
This isn’t a judgment on the decision to introduce formula, it’s simply clinical fact. Formula alters the delicate pH balance of the breastfed baby’s GI tract and changes beneficial gut flora that help newborns fight infection. Formula also introduces (and potentially sensitizes) the infant to foreign proteins, especially cows’ milk protein and soy protein, two of the most common allergens for young infants, and the latter a potential trigger for development of diabetes.
These illnesses could possibly have been avoided if the protein were introduced later when the intestinal lining was more mature (after 3 - 4 months). This isn’t a fanatic's wacky opinion, it’s data found in hundreds of credible and valid studies frequently published in the most reputable medical journals such as Pediatrics, Lancet and JAMA, for example:
pediatrics dot aappublications dot org/content/126/1/e18 dot long
and
ncbi dot nlm dot nih dot gov/pubmed/17853333 (edited because todaymoms keeps removing the links)
Where is informed consent? Would fewer mothers choose to supplement when not medically needed, would more parents demand affordable access to banked human milk? Why isn't the link between early introduction of formula and the potential risk of developing allergies, asthma and diabetes talked about more openly?
Nancy, knowing people won't want to hear this, and so won't believe it.
Whooooa there...haven't allergies in kids skyrocketed in recent years?...and so has breastfeeding...all us older generation people who grew up on formula (which my mother tells me was a can of PET milk mixed with some obsure vitamin mixture..yum)...seem to be allergy free.
My poor boobs...over 4 kids, 2 lactation consultants, meds, herbs, pumping (so exited when I could actually get a whole ouce out of both breasts woo hoo!)...I just don't make milk...NOT for lack of trying...so all my kids were supplemented...and normal and in all ways above average intelligence... :~)
My little guy did develop horrible allergies as an infant...the doc made me STOP nursing...(not that the little guy was getting much from me anyway)...and I can't blame the allergies on vaccines either, cause he isn't vaccinated...a little part of me wanted to blame the doner breast milk he had as a newborn for the allergies...giggle giggle
.....incidentally the last lactation consultant I saw was true, kind and realistic, and after our try, was honest and told me, "you've tried all you can, you can't make enough milk, it's ok"
When I told her "if this were ancient times, my kid's would all have died"...and she said "No, the lady down the road who has too much milk would just have been your best friend, you'd be cleaning her house, tending her fields and watching her older children, while she nursed your babies"...ta da...the first person to NOT guilt me like a child abuser or mutant.
Question, my baby was ill when she was born and could not digest my "milk" because she had a perforated bowel, she had no use of her large intestine and everytime we tried to give her breastmilk she became so sick because it was too rich for her weak intestine. What then do you suggest I should have done? We had to give her "predigested" formula which was $80 a canister, but today she is 5 years old and is a thriving little girl. She does have seasonal allergies but who doesnt, we as women need to not feel so guilty when the circumstances dont allow us to breastfeed it was heartbreaking for me. But she is alive and well, and that is all that matters.
Wow! I have four wonderful kids, two were breastfed, two were formula fed. Three have diagnosed asthma, two with eczema. You want to know which kids have asthma and eczema? The breastfed babies!! This is not to say that all breastfed babies are going to have asthma and eczema, but I am not into guilting mothers. We all have our choices to make in life, and truthfully, most choices we don't know how they will end up. We can spend time once our children are grown up and feel guilty for eternity, and it won't do a thing to change them. They are at that point, who they are. We do our best as informed parents and make the best decisions we can, but we need to stop feeling guilty about decisions we have already made, especially if we can do nothing to change it. I'm hoping when all of my children are grown, that I don't spend time feeling guilty, and instead choose to celebrate what wonderful human beings they are! If I sit and fret about whether I chose to formula or breastfeed, TV or no TV, co sleep or crib sleep, I don't think I will enjoy my free time as an empty nester, and I don't think I would be able to give good parenting advice to my grown children. There are no right answers, but there are better ways to think about things.
My son was both breast- and formula-fed. I started supplementing after returning to work when he was 6 weeks old. He developed eczema BEFORE I started supplementing. He has seasonal allergies. He is otherwise very healthy, has no food allergies at all, and tests a year above his grade level in school.
I think it worked out just fine.
My daughter was formula fed from day one- zero allergies zero ear infections zero anything. She was and is completely healthy, graduated with honors at 17 and off to college.
The best advice I received was from one of my L&D nurses when delivering my first son - do what works for YOUR family. Take all the information, sift through it, and decide what works for you! The supposed RN above, who I will assume posted her credentials to indicate how much she knows what's best for everyone, fails to recognize situations where some moms just can't. I have friends who have survived breast cancer but lost their breasts, one who couldn't produce enough milk no matter what (but who, thanks to an overwhelming lactation consultant, kept trying until the pediatrician ordered her to put the baby on formula!), and a SIL who struggled to the point of depression (because her lactation consultant kept telling her that it was best for her baby, and didn't she want only the best for her new son) to try to nurse. STOP the guilt train, ladies! This is just the start of the "you're only a good mother if you..." nonsense. If we only supported one another's choices as much as we are willing to tear one another down, ALL our children would benefit.
P.S. - And BTW - I did nurse, for the first five-six months with that baby and his brothers. Then my milk dried up and they lost interest. According to lactation consultants, I was a failure for not continuing to struggle to increase my supply. But since they weren't there to help watch the kids, do the laundry, clean the house, cook the meals, work a full-time job, and everything else a mom has to do, so I could sit back and work on my milk supply, their opinions have no weight.
P.P.S. - and to all the lactation consultants - when my third child was delivered, stillborn, thanks so much for ignoring my needs - your milk still comes in, but when I asked for suggestions of how to eliminate the pain and engorgement, they had no answers.
MassMommi,
So sorry for the loss of your child, and the lack of empathy you were shown.
The experiences of the women in my family are similar to those in yours. My milk supply dwindled at about 9 months, when my son lost interest and I had to coax him to nurse or take a bottle. I pumped, but seldom expressed more than an ounce in a 15 minute session. I am self-employed and was even able to keep my son with me at work, but since my breaks to pump only occasionally coincided with when he was hungry, I stopped producing as well.
My SIL's milk never came in at all, despite trying to nurse and pump. We both used a high-quality pump.
My cousin was advised not to breastfeed because her son was born with a severe heart defect, and his pediatric cardiologist wanted him to gain weight quickly to be strong enough for surgery. He was on a high-calorie formula.
I was formula-fed and never had diabetes or allergies. My parents were breast-fed and both are diabetic (adult on-set). As to respiratory infections, if you want to include bronchitis, I got that as an adult, and maybe twice in my lifetime, which I don't think is high and is probably comparable to those who were breast-fed.
I hate these stories that want to pit the breast-feeding crowd versus the formula-feeding crowd. Can't we all just get along? Seriously? I also hate that the author has to somehow feel shame for supplementing and has to remain secretive about it. As you can see based on the poll results, supplementing is something that is very, very common and nothing to feel ashamed about.
In the end, every mother should do what is best for her and her child, whether it means supplementing, using formula, or breast-feeding exclusively, and no one deserves bashing, hatred, or judgmental comments based on their personal choice. Stay out of it, worry about your own child and mind your own business. Last time I checked, this is a free country. It's HER child, HER decision, NOT your child or YOUR decision.
And on the other side of that, I was exclusively breast-fed and I have severe asthma, as well as allergies that required years of shots to bring under control. I also had numerous upper respiratory infections as a child, so there are always deviations on either side.
I agree with you, though. Like so many other things these days, people... it's time to stop spending so much time trying to shame someone else for doing something that doesn't impact or harm you. Live your own life and keep your nose out of everyone else's!
Thank the lord that someone else said this!! Im an expecting mom for the first time. Have two degrees. Literally working to solve the medical mysteries of this world. AND this debate keeps me up at night! Thank you so much for the input that someone out there is doing both (my personal choice) so I dont have to feel like a leper when I announce the decision to everyone.
Why are you announcing your decision to everyone? I really don't know why you think an announcement is necessary. I also don't know why some people think it is appropriate to ask.
I hate when people constantly belittle women who formula feed. Some women can't or just don't want to do it. I did my own little study among 10 women I know. Of the ones who were exclusively breast fed the first year - 3 of the 5 of them have food allergies (milk and eggs) and 4 of the five had pretty bad colds and respiratory infections during their first 3 years. Of the formula fed none have food allergies and only 2 had bad colds and infections the first 3 years. One of the moms in my "study" breast fed one and formula fed the other and guess which one has food allergies.....the breast fed baby. Not saying other studies are wrong, just that babies can get food allergies and sick when breast fed and a lot of formula fed babies never develop food allergies and are very healthy babies. I just wish people would quit making mothers feel bad for the choices they make. BTW - my daughter was a premie....31 weeks and formula fed. She has no food allergies, never got really sick (still doesn't at age 14) and is totally healthy.
I formula feed because my milk doesn't come in, I tried to breast feed with both, then tried to pump...they got the first six weeks, but then my milk dried up. Soo formula it is..happy, healthy babies both!
My mother worked in a lab and I was only on breast milk until older. Then I was supplemented with soy milk. Rice milk should probably be supplemented for males as it messes w/their hormones.
Excellent article...and while my story is different (aren't they all?), I can totally relate. Both of my sons were breastfed at the start but at a little shy of 6 months for the first and a little over 7 months for the second, their appetites started to outpace my supply, no matter what I did. While it started with a bottle a day, it didn't take long for me to decide (gasp) to stop breastfeeding altogether. Could I have kept trying? Sure. Was it worth it do so? I don't believe it was. My choice. And both of my boys are healthy - no chronic illnesses whatsoever, and only one of them has ever needed an antibiotic for an illness, and only one time.
However, I coworker who is still breastfeeding her 18-month-old daughter constantly reminds me that what she's doing is "best" and inserts little digs about my choice to stop. She also openly criticized another coworker who decided not to breastfeed her son. She had planned to try, even though she had no support whatsoever, but the last straw was when she contracted scabies from a patient at the hospital we all work at just days before she gave birth. Her chest was part of the area affected (awful, right?) and yet Mrs. Perfect has it all decided that the child would have been better off getting scabies as a newborn (yes, it could have easily spread even if she had pumped) than being fed toxic waste in a bottle.
Sigh.
Yes, we are responsible to take care of our children, but we also have to take care of ourselves. Breastfeeding is great and if you can make it work, that's wonderful, but to pretend like there is no reason "good enough" to choose formula is ridiculous. It's sad that we constantly have to defend our choices even while raising happy, healthy kids.
Thanks again for writing!
Ah...the classic pitting of mother against mother....isn't that nice?
My first son had breastmilk until I was laid out flat 3 months post partum with a horrid case of mastitis and a stomach virus. He would have starved had I not fed him a milk based formula. My milk supply did not come in at all with my 2nd child, but after being pressured and told I was a better mother if I nursed, my daughter was almost diagnosed as failure to thrive due to the weight loss she incurred while I was nursing like a fiend. Little did I know she was starving. To the forumla we went. She fattened up nicely. Cut to child #3. Formula from the get go.
I can count on 1 hand the number of illnesses these children have had, they have no allergies, nothing. Perfectly slim and healthy active children.
Cut to our organic, cloth diaper, breastfeed until she is 2 mom that is a friend. Her daughter developed a brain tumor and just finished up treatment.
My point?
You cannot assume that doing all the "right things" for your child will be protection against all things illness. Just because a child has formula doesn't mean that mom is an evil force.
Just based off the fact that some poor woman calls herself the "secret supplementer" should be clue enough that my boobs are not anyone's concern when it comes to my children. That is between me, my doctor, my husband and how the decision is made to nourish my child. So BUTT THE EFF OUT. Please :)
Fact: Only 5 percent of women worldwide cannot breastfeed for a legit reason (yes, WORLDWIDE...as in ALL women). So, most of the women who claim to have low supply, or that they couldn't provide milk for whatever reason, either have no clue, no info and/or no support. I personally find this sad and SCARY. Knowing all the facts of breastfeeding, I find it impossible to imagine any parent deliberately not breastmilk-feeding their child. Notice I did not say breastfeeding - I said breastmilk-feeding. Although nursing at the breast does have major benefits (oral cavity and sight development, among other things), the perfection of breast milk cannot be replicated. It is SO irritating how this issue is presented as a lifestyle choice. It is a MAJOR public health issue. If there were enough resources and dollars spent on educating expectant parents about breast milk as there is energy around which crib to buy and the newest nursery color scheme, the world would not only be a better place, but a healthier one.
Sorry, Spring, but you are a zealot. Breast is best, but formula is fine.
Like it was said above, pit mom vs. mom and it gets ugly. Every woman has a different story and every woman has a choice. Mine is simple, breast and formula, two boys now both teenagers. Both are healthy, active in sports and doing very well in school. Don't think what they were fed as babies made the biggest difference but more so at feeding time we snuggled together, made eye contact as well as skin contact even with a bottle. It was the relationship that was created when they were babies that has made my boys who they are today. Yes breast is best, I agree but you can't sit here and bash other families if they chose differently than you (or don't have a choice-adoption), most likely those formula fed kids will turn out just fine, all of us who where formula fed in the 1960's (I speak for that time period since that was mine) turned out to be fine productive members of society. Work on the relationships with your babies and children that is truly the best and will benefit them for their entire lifetime.
As a mother, if there were a way to give my child a better chance of not getting ear infections, diabetes, obesity, respirtory issues, allergies, childhood luekemia, other cancers, higher IQ (and the list goes on) - wouldn't I pay all the money I had to ensure my that my child had that advantage?
Seriously. Wouldn't I do that?
Why the debate? Why pointing fingers? You will either do it or you won't.
And it doesn't cost all the money in the world, it is free.
You better believe I support breastfeeding, but then I also am very in to car seat safety as well. I am a firm believer that there are a lot of things/ways we can't protect our kids from, but I will do my best to do what is in my control. Yes, there is a teeny, tiny percentage of women who can't and my heart breaks for them. Yes, babies have lived without breastmilk, but WHY on earth would you choose an inferior product for a new born baby? World Health Organization says: breastfeed, if you can't get milk from another mom who is breast feeding, if you can't buy donor milk, if you can't then result to formula. Think about that...
Also, ponder what happens if there is a natural disaster? (no clean water for instance?)
Anyway, if you choose formula, I do not think you are a monster, I just assume that you didn't gather all the information to make the right decision, or you are too busy to take the time, or you just don't want to. I think the same thing when I see kids who aren't in the right kind of car seat....
I think to automatically assume that just because they chose formula they didn't take the time or don't care is ludicrous. There is more than a tiny percentage of women who don't produce enough milk to nurse. There are also a lot of women who work and they can't pump enough milk. There are also women who are seriously prone to infections in the breast when they nurse. There are also a lot of women who have had breast cancer and had their breasts removed and cannot nurse. I think the biggest thing to me is that the people who are supporting breast feeding need to not be so judgmental. I tried to nurse my first and didn't produce enough milk and didn't with the second either. I am not stupid and I did not have no support. I had a wonderful support system and was told by my physician who was a specialist in the field that I could not produce enough milk. I believe breast is more natural and probably better. But I also think there are other issues as well. Most importantly, unless you have examined every single one of your decisions and found that you are in fact perfect and made every decision based on science and not what your gut told you was right for your family, then how dare you judge someone else. None of us are perfect human beings, be it on the job, for your family or for your children. Medical science has failed my children in quite a few ways and I refuse to just completely trust what they say and do whatever it is blindly. Most of the women I know who formula feed did a lot of research and soul searching and discussing it with their doctor and praying about it before coming to that decision. I want to know what the breast feeding moms on this site feed their children now. Are they equally concerned now with what chemicals and toxins are in their children's food as they were then or is it not important what we feed our kids after infancy. I firmly believe in breastfeeding and would have done it if I could. I support anyone who wants to do it. But it is ridiculous how high and mighty the breast feeding community is over themselves. Oh to be as good as they are!
Unless you actually know the whole story, you really can't say anything either way. The only one I'm truly annoyed with is my stepsister, who didn't even try with her two kids- one was a preemie. (Although that may have been the best, as she's now in jail for drug charges).
Personally, I supplemented with both of my boys starting between 3 and 6 months. I nursed my oldest until he finally weaned from his once-a-day feeding at almost 3 years old, and I'm still going a few times a day with my 20 month old.
I was a bit suprised that she wanted to start with formula before nursing though. If you choose to/are able to breastfeed, the first few weeks are the most important to give the baby immunities and to get the milk supply going.
Truly, to each there own. Who am I to judge? Both my kids were exclusively breastfed (while I worked full-time, out side of the home, 40 to 60 hr/week). I was very fortunate with my first to have a ton of milk, I had to pump between feedings even before I went back to work because I would get so uncomfortable. She nursed until 13 months. With my second it was pretty similar, except that at around 10 months my supply was going down and I wasn't pumping as much as he ate in a day. Luckily we had a good supply in the freezer so that made up for it. Drinking the Mother's Milk tea really seemed to make a difference and we nursed until he was 15 months. With both, the nursing stopped because I went on a 1 week vacation without my kids. the first time I tried to pump while away, but I just wasn't getting anything, the second time I weened before I went. I would have nursed longer if circumstances were different. I was honestly surprised how much I liked it. It was one thing I missed most when my babies grew up (now 2 and almost 5); that special time with just me and them.
Working outside of the home (while I absolutely hated pumping), I loved my time nursing the babies. It gave me a chance to reconnect after being gone all day. I get that there are a lot of reasons or circumstances why someone wouldn't breastfeed (like medication a women needs to take), but I'm genuinly curious as to why you wouldn't even try if you didn't have a pre-existing condition/reason to not. Its free! Formula and day care and all other baby related things are expensive. That is the number one reason I don't understand why more women don't make more of an effort. I guess I look at it as a given when you're planning to become a parent. Its part of the responsibilities. I'm not going to not put my kid in a car seat because I don't want to, right? So why would I not breastfeed just because I don't want to? If, after its been tried, and it truly just stresses you out (my sister-in-law was so anxious over breastfeeding) or just doesn't work, then so be it. But why wouldn't you at least try?
I have 6 month old; he is my fourth. Each baby has been breastfeed, but each has been different, depending on the baby and me. All my babies have been supplemented at one time or another, due to my inexperience, colic, or severe tongue tied. I feel like babies and moms take awhile to figure each other out and if the baby seems hungry offer them a bottle afterwards. My son doesn't need the bottle anymore but when nursing wasn't working and/or enough the bottle made sure that he was getting enough.
I forgot to add that I was also very fortunate to work at a place that provides a very nice place for me to pump and store my milk so that wasn't what I hated about pumping...I grew to actually hate the act of it after a few months.
I just don't understand why every journalist feels such a need to justify their formula feeding of their child, as though putting it out for the world to see and having someone agree with them makes it "OK."
I have gotten more abuse for breastfeeding from formula feeders than I've ever seen any of my formula-feeding relatives get from breastfeeders. If you don't want to, you don't want to...I'm still going to breastfeed my child and any future babies that come along. I'm not going to start formula feeding because some dingy journalist posts a photo of her baby looking pink and chubby, and that photo is somehow proof-positive of the merits of formula feeding.
The author was not pushing for everyone to supplement with formula. She was telling her story to illustrate the judgment heaped on mothers who choose to do so.
And there are plenty of judgmental posters on here who emphasized her point quite well.
I breast fed both of my sons one of whom was severely tongue tied and had to have his frenum cut. While I did supplement I didnt always want to but sometimes had no choice but to especially while in public. I think that everyone needs to be more tolerant of peoples decisions and beliefs.While breastfeeding has clear cut benefits compared to formula feeding not everyone has the ability or opportuninty to breast feed. While some of us get a gallon off of each side everyday they pump and freeze whats left for use at a later date alot of women have issues with milk production and for those women and children it is a good thing formula exists because not everyone has the a milk bank to go to or can afford to buy breast milk. So everyone needs to learn to be tolerant of both sides of the issue and deal with the issues caused by there own personal choice.
Adding a little fuel to the fire, the federal nutritional program for women and children (WIC) has a rule that if a woman is breast feeding, she will not be allowed formula for the first month of the infant's life. I took care of child who had to be hospitalized for malnutrition because of the bad advice and pressure his mother was subjected to. True, breast is best in many ways, but statistical outcomes should not be the determining factor in whether an individual mother chooses to supplement with formula. There are many more important issues at play here and well meaning professionals who choose to ignore these factors do a great disservice to all mothers. Breast feed if you can, but don't loose sleep if for some reason it doesn't work out.
What a completely ridiculous rule. I used to think that WIC was one of the more intelligently designed entitlement programs.
This makes sense to me. If you are breastfeeding why do you need formula.
Have you read the comments here by women who had inadequate supply? That's a reason you might need formula. Isn't it better for those mothers to breastfeed as much as they can, to provide the benefits unique to breast milk, and supplement as needed to provide the baby's caloric needs?
By and large, it is, but "the road to hell is paved with good intentions."