E-mail updates
Follow on Twitter
Subscribe to RSSFrom banning sweets to serving too much fruit juice, some feeding mistakes can backfire on well-meaning parents. TODAY nutrition expert Joy Bauer explains.
Bribing kids to eat their broccoli, banning sweets and offering too much 100 percent fruit juice can backfire on even the most well-meaning parents. Here are 8 feeding mistakes parents too-often make:
Live Poll
Parents, do you worry about your kids being overweight?
Mistake 1: Telling kids to clean their plate
For the most part, healthy young children eat when they are hungry and stop when they are full. As a parent, you don’t want to mess around with their internal cues by encouraging or bribing them to “clean their plates” and eat past the point of fullness.
Instead, provide small-moderate portions at meals and encourage your kids to eat until they are comfortably full. Teaching your kids to be “in tune” with their own hunger and fullness cues will allow them to have a comfortable relationship with food and avoid overeating as they grow older.
Mistake 2: Offering sweet rewards
Trying to get children to eat their vegetables can be downright frustrating – and parents often resort to bribery. Does this sound familiar? “Eat your broccoli and you can have ice cream for dessert.”
But unfortunately, this technique teaches our kids that broccoli and other vegetables are “less appealing” because their consumption requires a reward. At the same time, this approach positions dessert as the prize, something to be valued over other foods.
Plus, multiple studies have shown that, in the long run, preference for foods decreases when kids are given rewards for eating them. Bottom line: Keep dessert a separate entity versus the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.
Mistake 3: Serving up too many snacks
Constant snacking throughout the day translates to calorie overload – plus, can leave kids uninterested in nutritious food (like chicken and vegetables) at mealtime when lunch or dinner rolls around.
Try to stick to a consistent meal and snack schedule. Allow at least 2 hours between snacks and meals. No more than 2-3 snacks a day, and limit them to about 150 calories apiece.
Mistake 4: Filling up on empty liquid calories
An eye-opening study in the journal Pediatrics found that today’s youths take in 10 to 15 percent of their total daily calories from sugar-sweetened beverages (like soda, sports drinks, and fruit drinks) and 100 percent fruit juice. Further, kids’ average daily caloric intake from these beverages increased from 242 calories to 270 calories over the last 10 years and continues to rise. Most of these drinks are sources of empty calories, meaning they provide simple sugars but little else in the way of nutrients — plus, high-calorie beverages do not trigger the same satiety mechanisms as solid foods. This means that your kids are unlikely to feel full from drinking lots of soda or juice, and therefore will not innately compensate for the extra liquid calories they slurp up, which can inevitably pack on the pounds.
Your best bet is to limit the beverage choices offered in your home to water (including seltzer and sparkling water), low-fat milk (after age 2), and diluted 100 percent fruit juice on occasion. Don’t introduce young kids to sugary waters, juice drinks, or soda at a young age. Set a good example, and don’t drink them yourself!
Mistake 5: Giving in to kids’ dinner demands
When it comes to mealtime, kids inevitably request pizza, chicken nuggets, pasta, burgers and fries. Instead of accommodating unhealthy requests, parents should take charge — nix sugary breakfast cereals and pastries in the am, and provide ONE universal meal for dinner each night (of course, try to take your kids taste preferences into account).
In fact, you can even learn to prepare healthier versions of your kids’ favorite meals by making simple swaps in the kitchen: use lean meats (like ground turkey in place of fatty ground chuck), low-fat dairy (cheese, milk, yogurt) in place of full-fat varieties, and lighter condiments. If they love chicken nuggets and fries, prepare “baked” nuggets with “oven roasted” potato fries and a green vegetable. If they like burgers, make lean turkey burgers. If they crave pasta, try whole-wheat pasta with marinara and turkey meatballs.
And there’s no need to rely on “kid foods” every night of the week. Continually try out new foods and recipes -- healthy renditions of beef stir-fry, chicken parmesean, even hoisin-glazed salmon -- and make it a policy for your kids to take at least one bite. If you encourage them to sample new foods regularly, as they grow older and their taste buds evolve, they’ll be more likely to enjoy a healthy variety.
If they don't want to eat what's being served for dinner, I suggest offering one "back up" meal that doesn't require the stove or oven (this way you’re not a short order cook) — perhaps a bowl of whole grain cereal with skim milk and bananas, or maybe a peanut butter & jelly sandwich. This strategy gives the child some power, parents some less-exhaustive options, and puts boring limitations on dinner so your kids are more likely to venture out and try new things on the table.
Mistake 6: Letting kids overdose on screen time
According to a 2010 Kaiser Family Foundation report, in a typical day, 8 to 18-year-olds in this country spend more than 7½ hours using media (TV, music, computer video games, etc.). That’s almost a full work-day of media time each and every day! When kids are parked in front of the tube, they’re totally sedentary and eating up time that might otherwise be spent playing or moving around. Plus, there’s a good chance they’re mindlessly snacking on junk food while watching their shows — and also being bombarded by unhealthy food ads. SO it’s actually a TRIPLE whammy of unhealthy habits.
Set house rules on television time, and limit your kids to their favorite shows. Only have the TV on at set times when people are watching a designated program — don’t keep it on as background noise all day long. And definitely don’t allow the TV to be on during mealtimes —when it can distract them and interfere with them listening to their body’s natural fullness cues.
It's also a good idea to keep TVs and video game systems out of their bedrooms and store their electronics (cell phones, video games, iPads, laptops, etc.) in a public space at the end of the day so they’re not staying up late to use them at night.
Mistake 7: Letting kids stay up late
Sleep deprivation messes with appetite cues. It increases levels of hormones that make kids hungrier and decreases levels of hormones that keep kids feeling full, so tired kids are more likely to want snacks and nibble and graze throughout the day. Plus, if your kids aren’t well rested, you’ll have more issues getting them up in the morning in time to eat a healthy breakfast (and skipping breakfast makes them far hungrier in the afternoon/evening hours).
What to do: Set a firm bedtime, have a routine in place and get your kids ready for bed at the same time each night.
Mistake 8: Using strollers excessively
Strollers are a wonderful necessity, but using them excessively as your kids get older robs them of exercise — and reinforces the idea that it's okay to be sedentary. Whenever possible, encourage toddlers and young kids to walk on their own instead of being pushed in the stroller (when you're out for a walk, try 10 minutes in the stroller and 10 minutes out). And make sure you’re phasing out the stroller as your kids get older — lots of parents wheel kids around after 3, when they are certainly capable of walking.
For more information on healthy eating, visit joybauer.com and follow Joy on Facebook and Twitter.
"Like" TODAY Moms on Facebook, and follow us @TodayMoms
Leave a Comment:
We live around a half mile from preschool on a military post. There are several other families that live in our housing area and I see them either driving, carrying or using strollers to get their 4 year olds to school. I've talked to some of them and they can't get over how my daughter runs nearly the whole way to school every day. They lament they can't get their kids to walk. Well, we have really tried to make her walk since she turned 3 and since 3.5 when her brother was born, she walked a lot more since he was in the stroller. Now if we know we are doing a couple miles or more of walking we would bring the carrier for him so we could push her when she had had it. Unfortunately Americans as a whole are becoming more sedentary because no one lives close enough to stores to walk or there are no sidewalks so everyone drives.
I'm not worried about her being overweight because while she does get treats and things like chicken nuggets, they are treats, not every day. But in our hectic world, it's often easier for the parent to stop at the drive thru after picking up their kid from daycare even though there are quick cook options. I know some folks will say cook and freeze meals on the weekend, but some people don't want to spend their free time doing that, but quick prep meals are becoming healthier and stir fry only takes a few minutes.
I don't buy "kid foods" in the first place. My kids have been eating the meals that my husband and I eat since they could eat table foods. They don't know there are other options out there. They love vegetables and fruits, they love drinking from their mini bobble water bottles because they're just like my big one. Right now I'm pregnant so there are more unhealthy snacks (chips, cookies, candies) in the house and they do get to share them, but I do my best to eat them when the kids aren't around. (I'm 36 weeks, have only gained about 15 pounds and I know when to give in to cravings and when not to.) But we're all about moderation. No food is off limits completely. We know our kids will encounter junk food at other people's homes, at school, etc. We can't keep them from junk entirely so we aim to teach them moderation and healthy eating habits.
Great modeling. We are the only culture to have a completely separate 'kids menu' rather than having our kids eat smaller portions of what adults eat. Most foods developed specifically for kids are full of refined, processed ingredients and food colors that really shouldn't be in their everyday diet. As a pediatric dietitian, what a lot of families don't realize is that overweight/obesity is also considered malnutrition. You don't want to starve your kids, but allowing them to be overweight (all metabolic disorders aside) is just as unhealthy and irresponsible.
I agree - but in a restaurant, the real reason for having kids meals is portion size. Adult portions are too big for adults, and WAY too big and expensive for a little kid. And, you want your kid to be able to choose something off the menu rather than have to eat what one parent is eating. I do find it disturbing that rather than offer small portions of the adult meals, they provide overly processed food for kids.
I definitely agree for the reason for a kids menu in restaurants. Especially when it's the same foods just pared down (Outback has a great tiny little sirloin with a baked sweet potato). I think what I meant to refer to was 'kids foods' vs. 'kids menu'.
My kids are little so we're usually able to have them share from our meals at restaurants. They almost never eat the food we order specifically for them anyway. For some reason, my kids absolutely hate chicken nuggets. But, they love sushi, go figure.
Those "kid-sized" portions used to feed adults as well--remember the standard McMeal from the 1970s? One regular hamburger or cheeseburger, small fries, and a 12-ounce drink, all for under $1. That was meant for everybody, not just kids. It still works for me!
I can't recall ever finishing an adult-sized meal at any restaurant, I am always taking a box home with me.
Another suggestion. Limit food eating to the kitchen and dining areas. Don't eat in the car or other parts of the house. You'll reduce a significant amount of cleanup as well as snacking.
Dr. Shepp is right.
Milk is nothing but pure sugar.
Thrown in some nice refined breakfast cereal and violà...you have a classroom of autistic-like children who are obese and pre-diabetic.
Actually it has a lot of casein which is a protein with most of the essential amino acids. It's all kids drink at a age when they are growing like gangbusters building muscles and neuron connections. It is the furthest thing from "pure sugar". Also, the fat in it gives a "full" and satisfied feeling. While milk has lots of calories and you don't want to over do it, it's nothing like juice.
I read an article once that essentially said that the only reason cow's milk exists is to make a 200lb calf into a 2000lb cow.
We have milk that comes from our own mother for the same purpose.
Just a thought.
It's not pure sugar, it also has calcuim and is fortified with vitamin D. I would suggest using organic or at least antibiotic/hormone free milk.
Thought I'd seen it all until my friend showed up with her 4 year old in a stroller sucking on a bottle filled with soda!!!!!! I mean, come on!!! What do you even SAY to someone like that?? Isn't that almost a form of child abuse???
Did you say anything to her? I doubt it, I've seen the same thing with strangers and had to suppress the desire to slap some sense into them. You'd be surprised about the amount of ignorance and just plain laziness some parents have. How much more simple and cheap is it to put water in the bottle rather than soda? It staggers me sometimes.
Not only will that kid's baby teeth be rotten, her adult teeth will come in with cavities already formed. Hope her parents have set aside lots of cash for dental work! I hope the little nipper really, really likes spending time in the dentist's chair, too!
I had a similar jaw dropping moment years ago when I was eating at a restaurant with a friend of mine. Her son, who was probably 3 or 4 at the time asked for a milk, but she ordered him a coke because she didn't want him to fall asleep too early. What??? I was pre-kids and I think I was just plain in too much shock to say anything. I don't really hang out with her too much anymore, so I don't know if she still feeds her kids that way.
I had to laugh at that one! My father-in-law put Coke in my daughter's bottle when she was maybe 10 months old and I almost had a heart attack. Some people just don't think about what is actually IN the things they give their kids. If they did, they probably wouldn't put it in their own bodies.
Kids will learn to love whatever is before them. My sister is a vegetarian, and her boys love veggies. I'll never forget seeing her toddler son in a highchair chewing on a raw tomato wedge! I fed my kids very healthy at home, but as soon as they start visiting other people's homes, they encounter sodas and sugary snacks. Then they're hooked. Once they start school - forget about it. The epic battle begins.
If you set them up with healthy eating habits from the start they will always prefer healthy foods. They may indulge in junk food now and then but if their bodies aren't accustomed to the junk they won't eat as much of it. My kids love candy but even as toddlers they understand moderation because they listen to their bodies. If you keep that going your kids will make better choices when presented with options.
That's not my experience. I prepare (almost) every dinner the same way: a protein, a (whole grain) carbohydrate, and a vegetable. Kids don't just eat a little of everything until they are full. They'll eat the carbs all gone, lick off any sauce in the meal, and chug milk until they are satiated. They'll skip the protein and vegetables. But that is NOT a balanced diet, even if the components are healthy. So I give them tiny portions of everything and 1/2 glass of milk, and require them to EAT IT ALL. After that they are free to have seconds of any part of the meal, except milk (refills are water only). I don't know why, but kids prefer to fill up on liquids - sometimes even water - and then feel hungry half an hour later. Sometimes I even have to withhold water until they've eaten a few bites of food, or they will literally not eat.
JLM - I agree totally! No need to re-state, but the "naturally full" is not happening in my house either. I follow the EXACT same plan as you from prep to expectations. I also stop snacks after 4:00 and we usually eat around 7:30 pm.
From the halls of Obeseia watches Obeseus the god of fatness.
what you obeseians do is right stay obese and be proud.
1day you can walk the road of milk choculate in Obeseia!.
I some how lucked out.. I have a child that Doesn't like fries.. doesn't like nuggets!! and absolutely HATES cold breakfast cereal! If she doesn't get her Oatmeal for breakfast in the morning she is not a happy camper! (I can thank her grandpa for that one) she will eat just about anything that I put in front of her. UNLIKE her older brother that would rather take a beating than eat any veggie! he is now 22 and still won't eat them!
The one thing that I am at fault for sure is how much exercise she gets. I need to be more proactive in that department and we have talked about ways to get her more involved in outdoor activities. the only problem is that she is a special needs child and team activites are usually not an option for her.
The only advice that I can offer is to make more HOMEMADE things rather than pre-made/cooked foods.. that seems to be appealing to her. she helps in the preparation and in return makes the end result more appealing.
Great article though.. and I loved the feed back/comments Lots of helpful stuff!!
My son won't touch chicken nuggets either! He likes fries, but prefers oatmeal. He could make his own homemade spinach noodles at the age of 3 - seriously, he can mix the dough and then roll it all by himself with the pasta maker, then tells me to get cookin! Its all about the homemade stuff.
I have to disagree with the ban on frequent snacking. If done properly, frequent snacking can be okay. When I was a child, I ate small snacks all the time - literally a bite or two here and a bite or two there. I also did not eat much at meal times. At six, I wore a toddler size 2. Now, obviously, snacking on cookies and chips should be minimal, but healthy snacking is okay.
Both my kids snack throughout the day and eat at mealtime. Young kids need to snack because their stomachs are small and they need more nutrition than they can get in a meal. They are both extremely healthy because they eat healthy foods. At 3 years old my daughter is wearing 4T clothes, at 19 months my son is wearing 2T-3T.
Wearing a 2T at age 6 is not right, that's just too small.
My 4.5 year old is a frequent snacker - mostly veggies and some fruit and is in a 6/6x. She's just destined to be a tall girl. Thank goodness for adjustable elastic waist pant. Judging what size a kid wears is tough. Some kids are tall and lanky and others are smaller and pixie like. It's all in the genes for what their normal is. But every pediatrician says that kids should be able to have a healthy snack every 2 hours or so. Heck, they even recommend adults do that so then don't gorge on fatty foods at meals.
One of the mothers at preschool has a 2.5 year old who is going to be small and she wears the same size clothes as my one year old. She's perfectly healthy, just waifish.
Telling kids to clean their plate is probably the worst mistake. I hated when my grandma would try to justify cleaning my plate by telling me kids were starving in China. Fortunately I am a rather stubborn sort. To this day I only eat until I'm full, even if that means more than half of my meal is still on my plate.
I do not agree with feeding kids skim milk. Skim milk is not milk. I respectfully disagree with the above comments regarding milk. Milk does have nutritional value. Most dairy in fact has nutritional value. The key in consuming anything though is moderation.
I think the Milk suggestion is hilarious. I am married to a Dutch citizen and they are significantly healthier than US citizens. We were over there for the summer and they ate cheese like no other and when I noticed the milk tasted better than in the US I looked at the nutrition lable and it was a LOT more sugar-induced than in the US. I talk to my husband about the difference in eating habits in the US and Holland and here are the major differences....
1. People still have dinner together.
2. They don't eat cereal for breakfast and they don't have HOT LUNCH! They eat sandwiches on WHOLE WHEAT bread for both breakfast and lunch. They do NOT eat PANCAKES, BACON, EGGS, ETC for breakfast and they sure as hell don't eat PIZZA, SPAGHETTI, ETC for lunch. HOT LUNCH In our schools GREATLY contribute to the obesity in America. I ate hot lunch all my school life and I really struggle with not eating calorie rich crap for lunch AND dinner, when a cold sandwich would be healthier.
3. They do NOT eat out MORE than about once a month (it's really expensive to eat out over there) and they have a hard time understanding going out to eat for lunch (luncheons and lunch-dates just don't happen there).
4... they have one piece of meat at dinner time and it's about the size of their palm, and it's not ground beef. It's pork or chicken, lamb, or whatever, and it's not deep fat fried.
They eat as they like, drink way more milk, eat way more cheese, than we do in the US and they are the tallest nation in the world (and getting taller) and far less obese than in the US. Blame the hot-lunch crap at school, too many calories for lunch and dinner, and over-processed foods in the US. I loved eating over there... I lost quite a bit of weight and I enjoyed the foods I wanted to eat. They eat a lot more fish too... just "food" for thought.
I so agree with #2 on your list. We spend so much time and resources getting hot lunches into schools (think of the equipment and energy costs!) when all we need are decent cold sandwiches and fruit/veggies. If you must have something hot, how about soup and leave it at that? I lived in Denmark and Germany, and that was the model for kids who went to school without a lunch from home.
Hey copy desk --
"when your out for a walk" -- really? Not everyone is back from the holiday, huh?
It's all about modeling. Have you ever noticed that fat children have fat parents. Children who hate to walk have parents who drive around the mall parking lot looking for a spot near the door. Junk food junkie kids have junk food junkie parents. You get the gist. The apple (or in this case the doughnut) doesn't fall far from the tree, folks.
Our kids ate what was on the table for dinner, which usually meant lots of veggies and lean protein. No bottles after 1 year old, no junk food (except at grandma's house) and no sweetened drinks. Our biggest challenge was elementary school: most teachers gave out candy and/or soda as a reward!
Now in their early twenties our kids still prefer healthy eating to junk food. I passed along what I learned as a kid; healthy eating. I'm in my fifties and never had a store-bought cookie until I went away to college.
My mom is 90, takes no meds, and is active and lives alone. Healthy eating example number 1.
Fast food, sit down chain restaurants, corn syrup, too much bread, corporate semi-food heavy on chemical additives.
I have been heavy most of my life. I grew up in the 50's when few people were really heavy. I think I know alittle about weight problems. I don't really agree with this list except for the business about letting kids stay up late. When I reflect on my life there are three reasons I primarily had weight problems. First, and foremost my mother didn't control my eating. We could eat as much as we wanted and anytime we wanted. And all holidays there was enough food to feed half the town. If you want your child to be thin you MUST control what they eat. The same principal is true in regard to friends. If you want your child to stay out of trouble you must control their friends. Second, I loved watching TV, and my mother allowed us to watch TV as much as we wanted and as late as we wanted. When I was 9 years old on the weekends I would not go to bed until way after my parents. I was eating and watching TV. You control the amount of time your kids watch TV and you can reduce their weight. Kids when they have nothing do inside will go outside. The minute a kid goes outside he starts burning calories. Third and finally, I had a genetic disposition to gain weight. Some of my siblings were thin and some were heavy. I was the heaviest. We all grew up in an environment where we should all be fat, but we all weren't. So it tells me in many cases it is simply ones genetic disposition. If you have a child with a disposition that tends to gain weight you will need to work harder to keep his or her weight under control. It means it is going to be harder on you as a parent, but after all that is why they pay you the big money isn't it.
Best advice for parents? REFUSE to buy into our WEIGHT OBSESSED culture. Feed your children nutritious food and stop micromanaging every bite that goes into their mouths or your own. The media and Big Pharma want everyone to count calories all day long, and take every medication known to man so they teach disordered eating as a means to make us all sick so they can make a lot of money from us. A great way to end up with fat kids is to make it your life's work to keep them thin.
How about applying a simple concept called "moderation"....
I disagree with some of the advice. I do make my kids "clean their plate," but I also serve them tiny portions, and let them request more as needed. If I gave them full kid-size portions and let them eat until they wanted to stop, then they would just chug their milk all gone, eat the carbohydrates, and spoon off any sauce in the meal. They would skip the vegetables and protein, and the milk would satiate them for the next half hour - long enough to last through the rest of dinner time. When they start to feel hungry again, they'll just claim to be "thirsty" and chug milk until they feel temporarily full again.
By forcing them to "finish their plate," they are forced to eat at least some vegetables and protein, before getting full on liquids and carbs. I serve all dinners the same way: one whole grain carbohydrate, one protein, one vegetable. They don't get a balanced meal if left to their own devices. So they must eat it all (which is a small quantity) and are allowed only a half-glass of milk. Additional thirst results in water only. They are free to have seconds OF THE MEAL, but only after eating a decent amount of everything.
Lets stay real here. I have two children. They both eat the same. One is at a healthy weight whereas the other is underweight (he's 15 and weighs 80 lbs). I definitely do no agree with all the negative comments about milk. I honestly think if you have time, home cooking is the way to go. Stay away from prepared bought foods. Here's the "real part" I'm not saying NEVER have prepared foods as it's convenient when you're in a bind for time. Try to buy fresh ingredients and honestly, you can make great tasting meals with little effort and the secret is just that, fresh ingredients. You'll also save a ton of money with home cooking. Next, be an example to your children. My kids used to love going for bike rides with us. We'd pack a picnic and take off for the afternoon. In the winter we ski as a family but even if skiing isn't your thing (or in your budget) there are plenty of activities you can do outdoors with then and they'll appreciate the time you spend with them. My best advice is eat with them. We have dinner every night as a family. My husband sometimes doesn't join us because of work but one parent with a child or children constitutes a family. There is no television in the kitchen. This is the time of the day where we talk, laugh and joke. My daughter is 18 and goes to college. When she finishes school late she asks me to hold dinner until she gets home in order to eat with us. I also jog in the morning. They don't come with me but I'm convinced that one day rub it will rub off on them, even if it's not jogging.
I agree with pretty much everything in the article, except I'm quite tired of the low-fat advice. My kids are over two and still drink whole milk. They prefer water, so really they have a bit of milk in the morning, but most of the time they'll choose water. The fat in the milk prevents the absorption of any sugars in the milk, so you'll absorb more sugar from skim milk than whole. I went on a low-carb diet where I limited all simple sugars and carbs, and ate healthy fats (I'm not talking trans-fats) and veggies, ate proteins like eggs and didn't eat huge portions of meat, but I pretty much ate whatever kind of meat I wanted (I buy grass-fed beef). I ate my vegetables with BUTTER and if I drank milk, I drank whole milk (I also only drink a small amount of milk). I lost the 15 pounds I wanted to lose in no time. My kids are skinny as rails. They both love sweets and I don't ban them from their diets, but they're mainly limited to special occasions and the grandparents' houses.
All that being said, my daughter is still a bugger about eating most veggies and my son is a bugger about many proteins. I've fed them what we eat since we started giving them table food. I haven't figured out anything other than to not allow them seconds of fruit or something they like on her plate until she eats some of her vegetable. I do give her an initial small serving of everything, but no seconds on the stuff they like until they've eaten some of whatever it is they don't. And if we do happen to be having a dessert, I just can't bring myself to let them have some if they haven't eaten much of their meal. I don't know if I just don't understand what they mean by the whole "keep dessert a separate entity" concept?