Instead of worrying about Santa, show and share with your son your traditions. Give him the gift of more than one tradition to share with the world. Not only will it make your life smoother, but it will give him a broader experience to draw from when he is older. Smile and nod to the Santa, but be comfortable in your own beliefs and traditions to show equal respect to both.

Some of my fondest memories are of Christmas morning. I love the Christmas season, and I can see why you are not emotionally attached to it. For me, it brings me back to a wonderful time in my life where things were simple and I got toys from Santa. It is a season for giving, and spending time with family. There is a whole feeling, or spirit of Christmas, and I see why you dont feel it, but dont ruin the magic for your kids. It is a wonderful time....Let them enjoy the innosence of childhood with out overwhelming them with need be having to tell the truth. That is BS....Dont ruin your husband's half....Give him the opportunity to live the magic of the season with his kids, and sorry that you wound up alone in a movie theater on Christmas, instead of sharing and giving and loving the time, with lots of family members.

Teresa, i am also wearing your shoes ! It looks like i am having a De-Javu story here. In my opinion, i see some differences between bribing and rewarding . If you tell you child that he will be rewarded by a positive behavior , i do not see as a bribe, but as a reward. As you get rewarded by a good work, with Awards, money, etc. And is a good feeling to receive something you want , so we want to do more often, oppose to receive something before you do the job, or behavior. That will be a bribe in my opinion ! So, if you go to supermarket, and tell your child, best behavior and get a reward , that would be different than give a child what she wants at the door, so she keeps quiet all the time you are at the supermarket ;)

I grew up without Santa as well. My mom strongly believed that even the mere mention or image of Santa would diminish the true reason for Christmas. Now that I'm a mom with two kids, I'm having a hard time figuring out this whole Santa business. But I'm letting them lead the discussions, and it seems to be working so far.

Growing up, I knew that there was a Saint Nicholas in history, and that you get gifts from Saint Nicholas (Santa) on Christmas. I didn't think of it any other way than as portrayed. a magical Santa giving gifts. The Santas in the stores may look fake, but that's okay because Santa is not God, he cannot be everywhere at once, so he has helpers who dress up and entertain children in various places. As I got older I noticed that Santa always used my parent's wrapping paper and I figured out that "Santa" wasn't "real," but my mother corrected me. The spirit of Santa, the giving, the hopes and dreams, those are real, so in a sense Santa lives on.

I posted earlier, but it seems to have disappeared...Since Santa, as fun as the tradition might be, is the commercialization of Christmas, I always made sure my kids knew that Christmas was a religious holiday, not just about Santa. Rather than use Santa as bribery, I tried to not use the naughty or nice criteria for gifts, but instead, related the gift-giving to Santa recreating the gifts that the Magi brought to the baby Jesus.

Now is your time to make Santa and Christmas what YOU want it to be. Good behavior is expected in our house all year long, so it's never been linked to Santa and Christmas. Christmas for us is about the religion, yes, but it's also about strong family traditions that we've built for our family: making, sending and receiving cards, baking cookies to give everyone, holiday functions and events throughout the month, giving and receiving gifts, and making charitable donations from their own toys prior to Christmas. Take this time to build your own traditions and find your own meaning for Santa and Christmas for your child. As the adult, you have the power to do that and make it all you want it to be for your family. And...FYI...the tooth fairy isn't far away for you either!

Jen www.thewholebagofchips.com

Also a Jew here, with a non-practicing Catholic former alter boy husband. Worst for me was when my kids were very young and we'd celebrate at their aunt's house. We had very little money for gifts and went the puzzles, books, barbies route. My sister-in-law bought her kids electric jeeps and giant toy kitchens and nintendo but insisted the tags all say "from Santa with Love." I had to tell my girls that auntie-Jo was that family's Santa, or else how could I explain why my wonderful, well-behaved, "nice" kids didn't get the same caliber of gifts? Oy. Glad those years are past.

Kids are going to ask about Santa no matter what religion their parents are. Now that I think about it, I am surprised that the truth about Santa doesn't come out a lot sooner in a child's life because of different religions and beliefs. Anyway. I am not a parent but I am a preschool teacher. I've heard lots of parents use the phrase "If you're not good, Santa won't bring you any presents." This bothers me because it's an empty threat. They will still get presents even if they are naughty. So my thought and theory is (if you plan on letting your children believe in Santa) to tell them that Santa brings gifts to all children because he loves them and wants to help make them happy. Or something to that affect so it doesn't turn into an empty threat/bribe. I don't want to take the idea of Santa away from my children(when I have them) because they get joy from it. But the traditions and beliefs that he will get are from you. You can teach him whatever you want to, however you want to.

As a Jew with a nonpracticing Methodist, Santa is in the same boat as the tooth fairy. A magical creature that brings one gift on a certain day without strings. Actually nicer because the tooth fairy demands that tooth doesn't she? I explained that the Santa's in the mall were like Mickey Mouse at Disney world. People in costume making the holidays fun. Would I ever let her sit on a Santa's lap. Hell no. I have more faith in Disney's hiring practices than the one at the Mall. That being said, build your own traditions and stories, and Santa will be around as long as they believe.

I agree with you! I'm a Jew. I never was made to believe in any fantastical character in any way than as a fictional character -- including gnomes, tooth fairy and the religious characters like santa and easter bunny. I did not even know growing up that there were kids who really believed that santa lived. I thought that everyone knew it was a big Christmas joyful game and that their parents and uncles and aunts and friends were the santas. I was shocked, stunned and somewhat horrified not only to learn that some kids in fact believed in this creation, but, worse, that their parents encouraged the belief, the lie. I thought that it was dastardly. I still do. There is simply too much deceit in the normal course of events. We wallow in deceit. We learn it at our parents' knees -- in these very ways.

We have no intention of raising our daughter with the myths of Santa, Jesus or God.

I truly agree with the vote on the right hand side--- you people are totally overthinking Santa, whatever faith you believe.

I am a Christian and I believe that Christmas Day was the day baby Jesus was born. With that in mind, I have no clue what Santa has to do with Christmas. I realize Santa was originally Saint Nicholas, and I am sure if I Googled the original Saint Nicholas, I would find that he did something like celebrating Jesus' birth by giving gifts to the children in his village. But I have never Googled him because he already gets too much attention when he is (should be) an extremely small supporting character in Christmas Day as a whole. But at what point did Christmas become a celebration of Santa with a little Jesus mixed in, as opposed to vice versa? For me personally, it does not matter that I am a Christian or if I was a Jew, Santa does not come to people's homes anymore and give gifts and I have always told my children that he is just pretend. We do the Santa-lap pictures and so forth just for fun, just like we do the Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy who my kids also know are not real. The only problem my honesty causes is that I also have to tell them to not tell their friends the truth because that is a decision made by those children's parents. With that said, I believe a Jew could use or not use Santa however they wish as easily as a Christian could since Santa is really the commercial symbol of December 25, and is not what Christmas is about anyway.

Stressing over Santa is kind of pointless. The kid will eventually find out from his preschool peers that Santa isn't real. You'll probably have bigger issues if your husband has doubts about giving your son the religious education of your choice. It's never too early to discuss with your husband whether you want your son to learn Hebrew and have a Bar Mitzvah or not. Maybe he doesn't mind, or maybe he wants your child to have a confirmation. Or maybe you don't care. When you agree to raise your child a certain faith, the reality often creeps in that your spouse might not feel as comfortable as he/she originally thought before your child was born. Those are the bigger issues that often rock interfaith couples.